Balling on a budget, the SWAGGER way

So you went against your better judgment and you blew your salary on that $4000 Gucci leather bag. The kind of bag which emits the smell of the last species of an animal forced into extinction. Or you might have made a check payout on that Aston Martin DB 9 car even though your 2008 Lamborghini Gallardo was still banging, and in all sense of the word.

It happens! We all want to look good; we want to splurge a little (okay, a LOT) for all the hard work we’ve put in. We try our damnest to impress our exes and we want them to beg for our love again.

And you know that with each new acquisition comes a new friend. So it’s time to take the big guy and the dead out for a spin. You’re embarrassed by your limited cash flow. Yet, there is no parking lot big enough for an Aston Martin at a mall and your Gucci bag is not meant to come into contact with plywood.

But you can’t wait for your assets to meet your material friends. Don’t worry. Swagger Essentials will provide you with tips on How To Ball on a Budget – With Swagger.

1) Membership

Membership privileges give you all the perks you will ever need. Be it discounts or reward points, you are bound to reap the benefits of spending frugally. Having a membership with a fancy restaurant or retail shop is also a novelty. The waiters and sales persons address you by your first name. You are treated like royalty.

All this time while spending on a budget.

2) Happy hours

Twice the fun, two times less than the price. What better bargain can you ask for? With free flow of beer, alcohol and snacks, you can bring on the partying without a worry for your tabs. Let your inhibitions run free! Party like a rock star!

Psst: Just be sure to exit right before the promotion ends.

3) Cash that credit card

We have financial advisors breathing down our throats now. We know that many people have landed huge debts due to over-spending. We’ve caught Confessions of a Shopaholic. But credit cards are not the problem; frivolous spending is. And you will not fall into the deadly trap, because you are a person of swagger. You think before you act.

Banks have tie-in promotions with big names franchises and cashing your credit cards gives you access to these privileges. Besides, when you fish out that card right out of your wallet, you can be sure your vulture friends will gleam in envy.

4) Buffets

One of our favorite 7 deadly sins, gluttony, is going to help us in our quest to spend on a budget. A buffet meal helps to curb any future expenditure. We need not point out the obvious; food and drinks are taken care of. And dessert is aplenty, so you need not spend any more money on sweet delights.

After-dinner activities? Your friends will be too floated from the gorging that they won’t even be able to move an inch! That means the decision to catch movies will be scraped. That means you get to keep to your budget, again.

You drive them home in your Aston Martin and they will thank you for your good deed.

So there you have it, living on a budget the SWAGGER way.